A few weeks ago I blogged about using a harness on Caleb when we go out. As much as I hate having my child on a “leash”, I realize it is necessary for his safety. Well today, even with the harness, I managed to lose him briefly. A few years may be subtracted from my lifespan due to the stress of that moment. But as scary as the experience was it could have been MUCH worse.

We went to Discovery Place today in uptown. Jadon ran into a teacher from his preschool who also has a son in Jadon’s class, so we all roamed around together. An exhibit going on right now is about the circus. There is an “enclosed” section where there are costumes and props with a stage for putting on a show. I use quotation marks around the word ”enclosed” because the area was not as enclosed as I originally thought. We all went in to play for a bit. Caleb lifted up a fake barbell and I went to grab my BlackBerry to take a picture. That was the beginning of a series of unfortunate events.

My phone was not where it was supposed to be. Since Jadon was still playing with his friend whose parents were playing with them both, I took the opportunity to retrace my steps taking Caleb with me. I didn’t find my phone so I headed back to the little stage area and released Caleb into the “enclosure.”  I sat at the entrance/exit and did a thorough check of my bag looking for my phone. When I didn’t find it I said a little prayer that someone honest would find it and turn it in. Then I went to play with the boys. Two trips around the stage later and I realized Caleb was nowhere in sight! CALEB! My non-verbal child who does not respond to his name and has a tendency to wander if given the freedom had somehow managed to get away from me in a crowded place! In that moment I realized I was smack in the middle of my worst nightmare. Admittedly I forgot about my eldest son as well as my missing phone and ran around aimlessly for a few seconds searching. I was about to scream into the air “NOBODY MOVE! I’VE LOST MY SON!” But then I caught a glimpse of the Kapla exhibit where kids were building things out of wood blocks. I know my son, and THAT definitely would fascinate him. I rushed over just in time to catch him before he knocked over a tower being built by an unsuspecting 12-year-old girl. With Caleb securely in my grasp, and me able to breathe normally again, we made our way back to where I’d left Jadon. But before I could get to him, the fire alarms went off! Again I felt life drain from me. I was teetering between relief I’d found Caleb before it happened and panic because I didn’t have Jadon. Against the rules I headed the opposite way of the nearest exit. Just as I reached the stage area Jadon flew out with his hands over his ears, scared of the alarms. Finally with both kids safely in tow we made our way out of the building. By the time we were able to stop and rest I didn’t know what to feel first; the experience was overwhelming. Jadon however felt no such conflicting feelings; all he wanted was to go back inside and finish playing! I wanted to go home. But then there was still the case of my missing BlackBerry.

About a half hour later the “all clear” was given and most people went back inside. Sidenote: I just realized I never found out what caused the alarm, yet I still went back in the building. That’s unlike me. Anyway I made a deal with Jadon that if I found my phone, he could go back and finish playing. Thankfully my prayer was answered and indeed an honest person had found and turned in my phone. So back upstairs we went for about another hour so Jadon could play.

As I type this thinking back on the day’s events I am amazed (and a little impressed) with how I handled everything. I’m not at all being egotistic. I’m just really awed that those very stressful situations didn’t leave me a nervous wreck, and we were able to still enjoy the rest of our day. It had to have been by Grace. Really. I’m not that strong.